I hate most wedding announcements. They are boring, fake, nothing elegant, not original and most likely use that font called, wait for it, Papyrus. Oh how this world can do with out. But, this post is about how something can have a million plus dollars spent on it, yet that gross creepy typeface will sneak in to ruin everything. PapyrusWatch.com is where you can report your findings. Kind of like the people of WalMart site, and how we must make fun of them, I as a person who cares what font some one uses will make fun of Papyrus. woof.
But, it gets better. Avatar, yes you've prolly seen it, but i haven't. But guess what, Papyrus made it into the movie. Double woof. Anyways here is a letter of thanks from Papyrus to Avatar/Mr. James Cameron.
Dear Mr. Cameron,
A letter such as this can hardly do justice to the overwhelming gratitude I’m hoping to express herein. Your most recent film, Avatar, has finally legitimized my work in a way I’ve only ever dreamed of.
Goodness knows I’ve worked hard the past 26 years to make a name for myself. And it’s felt great coming to the aid of New Age spa owners, suburban party planners, and young couples looking to save money by making their own wedding invitations. But only now, by appearing in your movie, have I been given mainstream, high-level recognition as a serious typeface. And for that, I thank you.
Imagine my delight so many months ago at seeing the trailers and posters for this, your much anticipated return to science fiction movie making. To see the title AVATAR (all caps!) typeset in yours truly. Well, I practically wept. And to be rendered in such an artificial luminescent way... finally, in the hands of a true visionary such as yourself, my potential to look totally badass had been realized.
Little did I know that that was only the tip of the iceberg (no Titanic reference intended!). After seeing the finished film (in Imax 3D of course), I can easily say it is the greatest movie ever made! To think, among your many bold choices as a filmmaker—soldiers who fly helicopters despite mastering interstellar travel; inexplicable floating mountains; and humans still petty enough to commit genocide in order to acquire precious minerals such as the very cleverly named unobtainium—that I would be one of them. Kudos to you for not spending a single cent of your massive budget on an expensive, attractive font for the subtitles, and opting to put me to the task instead.
Shockingly, as if you hadn’t already done enough for me, when the title card appeared at the end of the picture, there I was again! Chills, I tell you, chills. I hardly have words, even now, to describe my sheer admiration for this final master stroke: glowing, green letters filling every inch of the screen. A lesser director man might have settled at filling the screen left to right, but not you. You saw me, in my humble proportions, and said No, not big enough. Undoubtedly, a few mouse-clicks later, your most talented technician had me soaring to new cap-heights. Let me never come back down.
Read Hipster Runoff for your fix/breakdown of the Super Bowlz. Below is "I AM CARLES's" conclusion to the Super Bowl.
Does the Super Bowl bring humans together? Is Hurricane Katrina ‘over’? Is Haiti Earthquake ‘worse than’ Hurricane Katrina? Should we pull troops out of Afghanistan? Will New Orleans be destroyed by a Hurricane withing the next 5 years, making this Super Bowl victory irrelevant? Who is the most marketable athlete? Do lifestyle brands ‘waste money’ on Super Bowl ads? What product r u gonna try because of the Super Bowl? Do sports ‘matter’? Is American Football overrated by Americans? Is the World Cup the only pure sporting experience?
Predicted Super Bowl Halftime shows performers for the next 10 years: 2011: Kings of Leon 2012: John Mayer + Justin Timberlake 2013: The Killers + Jay-Z and Beyonce 2014: Arcade Fire / Death Cab 2015: Lady Gaga 2016: Coldplay 2017: Vampire Weekend 2018: The Beatles [via hologram] 2019: The Black Eyed Peas 2020: Washed Out, Neon Indian, Justin Bieber
The other day, was talking to some people about weddings. Mostly how I hate weddings. Then I came to the conclusion that my wedding is going to be black. Maybe it will have some white. But black and white to say the least. I mean, everyone always gets caught up in the colors of what they want at their wedding, matching this, that etc, well, Black is black. White is white. No shades of in-between. But then again, if I do end up having to have "color" then I hope my wedding ends up like this. zomggg.
I HATE Halloween. Its lame. Its pointless. People should not need a holiday to get dressed up. Its just a fake holiday. But thats now that this post is about. What its mostly about is how I had the worst, I mean WORST weekend I have ever hard, and it happened all on Halloween day.
But before I get into that day particularly, I'm just going to let you in on something that happened last weekend. On my way to see the movie It Might Get Loud, a documentary on the electric guitar, I got in an accident and rear ended someone who stopped on a green light in the MIDDLE of the intersection. WTF right. Oh and PS, the movie I was going to see, quit playing the night before. FML.
Now to Halloween. On paper, the day itself was supposed to be a decent day, besides the fact it was Halloween. But who are we kidding, it sucked. It started out fine. I was in the right place at the right time, yet I still got screwed over. My car window got bashed in and my stereo was stolen. Of coarse I filed a police report, but we all know that does nothing. Whoever stole my subs and amp out of my trunk, broke my passenger window, glass was everywhere, then reached over and popped my trunk and wiped everything out. Left my CD player in the dash, but my trunk was left empty. Who ever did it prolly has a dozen CD players laying around and didn't need my ghetto one cluttering up their stash.
Not only did they ruin my car, they ruined my plans for the day. I was supposed to be going to an MFO, (mandatory-family-outing with my parents, one of my brothers and his wife) which was lunch and the Michael Jackson movie, This Is It. Luckily I have an awesome older brother who helped me out. While I called him only to tell him his stereo stuff he was letting me use was stolen, he just started to help by calling around and finding me a window. After finding a window at a junk yard, its almost time for the movie, since he wasn't going to the movie, he drove me back to Salt Lake and then volunteered to replace my shattered window while I was with the other half of my family. How nice is that?
By making the rest of the night as good as I possibly could with a start to a crappy day, I decided to relax in the hot tub. Once again, I get screwed over. My phone ends up being too close to the tub and gets covered in steam, leading my phone to look and act like its been in a puddle for the past hour. So now to top off my day, my phone decides to quit working. All in one day that people call Halloween, my car gets jacked and my phone breaks. This day was HELL. Happy effing HELLoween.
Now, I know this sounds like a poor me blog post, but srsly people, I just blame Halloween. They say bad things come in sets of 3. Lets count them out...
1. I got in a car accident last weekend 2. My car window got bashed into pieces and my stereo gets stolen 3. My Blackberry, my life, gets wet and now its just a fancy paperweight with a keyboard
I guess the one thing I'm grateful for out of all this is my the fact that I still don't have the Swine flu. \
This is dedication to amazing people in my life that come from the east side of town called Holladay. First off, Stu, Stu Heart. A man who is known for his mad skill. When he isn't performing music awesomely in his band The Mange or with our homegirl Marci Thorne, or our main man HEMA, we make forts. We party just about 100 percent of the time and then we listen to music to kill the rest of the time we're together. But if we're not doing any of that we are promoting Viva la Resistance. He's like a blood brother to me, well not really, but I can see us eventually making the commitment to becoming a part of the same pack of wolves we call life. Oh yeah, he plays baseball, Thats something I don't know anything about. But what I do know is he is an uber friend. I would give this man 7 pounds.
Next, the lady in my life I have the pleasure to call Snacks. For about the first million times I would see her around she was eating cheddar Cup-o-Noodles. Did I mention how she has serious street cred and is just about down for anything that isn't lame? However, I have never made a fort with Snacks, I'm sure our time will come. Oh and her style, as you can tell, its next level. Just look at that dress she is rocking, not to mention her affinity for sailor attire we both share with one another.
In conclusion and to tie this whole dedication together, these people know how to get down on the dance floor. The Kool-Aid Social was a memory we will all share together. Awesomeness shared all around.
My brother, literally, my bro, my blood, my older sibling, someone who I grew up with... Whatever you call want to call him. He has started his birthday. I say started his birthday because its more than a month away from the actual day when he was born. He was the oldest, therefore, he was the perfect child, the standard for what was expected from me. This is me wishing him a happy birthday. Oh, and that picture is a glory shot from high school. As you can tell, he is the epitome of cool.
Sarah Morrison. Sarah Mo. Every time I read something of hers, I start laughing. How she makes me feel so uncomfortable its perfect to why she makes my day every time I read a tweet from her. Call her whatevs, but just know this lady of ladies has street credit. She can make you laugh at everyone and everything around you, and the only reason why you're laughing is because you know how true it is because its that thing you thought nobody would ever bring up in public. Who cares what she says. Life is good, its even better when Sarah Mo is making fun of you. A person of many words is Sarah Morrison.
My Name is Earl. Funny stuff. Jason Lee/Earl. Great. This winter break I have watched My Name is Earl too many times. Great stuff. Karma is a funny thing. And now I'm a believer in Karma is everywhere and everything. Jason Lee Made me believe that. Anyways.... Srsly, Jason Lee, Amazing actor and skater. Started the skate company Stereo. Who would of thought that those kids everyone is saying that they cause trouble, turned up to be an actor and good guy? eh?
Since this week my heart goes out to how much I really hate cops... this document is for you. The officer is charged 20hrs of pay cause he chased some kid who flipped him off probably while not commiting a crime like skateboarding. who knows.
More from you local stupid SLC cops doing stupid/dirty things here.
Like I said before, this kid has what it takes to make it big. He is now like a triple times a million threat in what he can do. His intro video to his new YouTube channel Bernice-Jauch-Talk.
....to all the Hipsters!! You know who you are. You know that I'm attracted to your looks. But Who are we kidding? Hahahaha. I LOLd' pretty hard. enjoy.
Dood. Like Dude, Don't call Me Dude, Its Doooood!! Just watch how stupid cops are.
When I got my ticket and the stupid officer wrote the wrong year on it more than once that is when I officially thought cops were idiots. This video proves why I could care less when police officers get hurt or shot while on duty. Its because of stupid ones like this that get the karma going and it doesn't even effect them. Then they get hurt and since its union they get paid to do nothing but be a bigger mofo than what the devil himself is. Such Jerks. Granted they are there to protect and serve but its the ones like this that make me glad to hear about someone getting back at the cops. I support law enforcement when someone breaks the law, but skating/snowboarding is NOT a crime.
